Do You Really Need Closure?

Getting ghosted. Being fired. Losing a parent.

When difficult things happen, our first instinct is often to seek answers. Why did this happen? How could this be? What will it take to feel better again?

In short, we seek closure — and the more satisfying it is, the better.

Experts say that closure may help some people heal. A resolution can make it easier to “transcend that particular event and move on to other things,” said Arie W. Kruglanski, a professor of psychology at the University of Maryland.

But is closure always necessary? And is it always possible? Dr. Kruglanski and other experts say the concept can be both useful and detrimental.

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Seeking closure can help people arrive at decisions and make sense of difficult circumstances.

Dan P. McAdams, a professor of psychology at Northwestern University, studies how people tell their own life stories and how those narratives create meaning for them. His research of people in midlife has found that those who are flourishing are more likely to tell redemptive stories about negative events from their past — a form of closure — than those who are struggling.

For example, rather than ruminating over a difficult divorce, they might instead embrace the narrative that leaving their ex allowed them to find someone who was a better match.

Read the whole story (subscription may be required): The New York Times