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Here’s How to Make Resolutions Stick, According to a Behavior Change Scientist
The Harry Potter audiobooks helped Katy Milkman make a foundational discovery about exercise behavior. A Harvard graduate student at the time, she was struggling to work out. Once a varsity tennis player, she no longer had teammates and apractice routine to motivate her, and she faced seemingly endless claims on her time. But she had Harry and Voldemort. “I came up with this hack,” she said, “which was that I only got to listen to audio novels when I was exercising. This was life-changing for me.
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Our Favorite Relationship Advice for 2026
Most couples — even the unicorns among us who claim they “never fight” — need regular relationship maintenance. And the effort comes with major payoffs: Strong romantic partnerships are good for your mental and even physical health. ... When we set personal boundaries, we are drawing a line between our needs and those of other people. That helps us maintain healthy relationships, said Catherine A. Sanderson, a professor of psychology at Amherst College. ... Another banger? “Let me try that again.” Laurie Santos, a psychology professor at Yale and host of “The Happiness Lab” podcast, suggests using the phrase — and does so herself — when things come out too harsh.
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A Better Way to Think About New Year’s Resolutions
... In the long run, resolutions that keep others in mind tend to have greater staying power. Studies have found that brute willpower alone lasts for only so long, and that people have a much harder time accessing willpower when stressed. This might help explain why a more individual New Year’s goal, such as losing 10 pounds by swearing off ice cream, may be more likely to fizzle. “If you fail in your quest, then the only person you have ‘let down’ is yourself,” Kurz said. Evolutionarily speaking, people might not even be built to set self-serving goals.
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Who Counts as a Significant Other?
Finding "the one" can seem like life's ultimate goal—but should it be? This hour, TED speakers expand the definition of life partnership, whether it's with a friend, a spouse, a pet, or no one at all. Guests include journalist Rhaina Cohen, marriage and family therapist Stephanie Yates-Anyabwile, social psychologist Bella DePaulo and photographer Elias Weiss Friedman of "The Dogist."
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When Joy and Grief Collide on Your Wedding Day
The day before my brother’s wedding, we stood together on the concrete car park that covers a fraction of our mother’s yard. I had written my best man speech on the plane from New York, and the loss of our father featured heavily. I asked Jordan, my younger brother, whether he had thought about our father in the days leading up to his wedding. ... “It’s actually extremely common,” Tessa West, a social psychologist at New York University, said of situations in which joy and grief collide. “What’s not common is for us to know what to do with those competing emotions. There’s no right or wrong way to feel happy on a sad day or vice versa. Grief works like that.” ...
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What Is ‘Functional Freeze’?
Let’s face it: The holidays aren’t always the happiest time of the year. We’re busier than usual, scurrying around buying presents, mailing cards and attending events. We’re battling the nasty winter illnesses that pop up in December. And we’re often navigating complicated family dynamics while feeling pressured to create perfect memories. ... These feelings may arise from being overwhelmed by the demands of everyday life, said George A. Bonanno, a professor of clinical psychology at Teachers College, Columbia University and the author of “The End of Trauma.” They could also be a product of information overload, he added.
